Miles by distance, inches by thoughts

Dear bloggie,

Times are getting harder as it is.

I want this, i need that, i must take it, i should have those, believe it'll come in handy.

Thanks to the timetable the following sem, the subjects offered are either not related to what i'm studying OR i've taken them in my past sems before this (as expected AND as notified early from Black Mamba months back - very accurate!). And also thanks to the timetable this coming sem, my intern which i have planned to do after my last three subjects has to be pushed forward. In other words, i have to quit H.O.G. to concentrate fully on the intern months - short sem 2/3 months; long sem 4/5 months. In other words, i have no income coming in since i quit the other. In other words, i have to cut down on spending. In other words, i have to cut down on going out with my buds and relatively, people who usually don't pay for me when we're out... In other words, i can't buy anything from my wish-list i planned months ago from next month onwards!

I have two places of workplace choice - A. Hospital, B. Factory office. My answer? BOTH. Not at once! Separately since i have two majors~ I like my choices. But how available they are is another question... I really really really will miss H.O.G. so much and it's such a pain to know that i won't be seeing the kids much anymore... Macy, Megan; Tricia, Kristy, Jia Ze, Zhen, Ern; Sonia, Serena; Yi Chen; Sonya; Alia; Damien's sister (she can't really walk yet, no she hasn't joined H.O.G.); Claudia; Brandon, Brian; Brandon, Bryan; Ivan; Nigel, Nelson; and the a whole LOT more.

After working with them for just a couple'a months, i really feel as a part of their family already. Being there to watch over the smalls and bigs, washing their cups and jug, cleaning up the place of needed, keeping the toys, putting the books in order, talking to the parents, sending the kids down, reminding them to stay away and out, and the typical:

"What are you doing?"

"I"m busy here hold on aight"

"What are you doing?"

"Sending everyone down hold on"

"Why do you do that?"

"Because i can't let them run down just like that"

"*Stares blankly waiting for another answer from - why*"

"*sigh* because it's my job sweetie..."

"Oh! *runs off*"

"... *rolls eyes*"

OR

"He hit me!"

"Okay okay! No need to hit back!"

"But it hurt and he hit me!"

"You're a good boy and you don't hit back. Good boys like you don't hit your brothers back"

"*pout* ..."

"I know it hurts darling but you know how if feels doesn't you? There's no need to hit back. If he hits you again, tell me alright? You're a good boy!"

"*nods* mm"

OR

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"That"

"THAT?"

"Yea THAT"

"Because i have to...?"

"Oh. Why?"

"Or everyone's gonna be running down"

"Who?"

"You duh"

"Me?"

"Yes YOU"

"But i'm not gonna run down"

"I see"

"What are you doing?"

"My job"

"What job?"

"THIS"

"What's that?"

"Oh just, THAT"

"..."

"*raises brows and smiles a little while checking kid's name list and receipt codes*"

"..."

"*still working on it*"

"I think i'm gonna go out"

"Oh alright"

"*GRIN*" -> I never knew i was so irritating towards kids! =DD

OR

Okay there's a little too many to list down since last year! Or just better times like when they love you so much they just run into the office and hug you, talk to you about everything that's happened, bring the Petster pet magazine to share the pets for adoption and suggest pets for you to adopt while waiting for sibling, hold onto your hand when you send the kids outta the centre outta no where, or just anything that drives you up the wall. Literally. UP.

It really is a special place to be. I have never enjoyed my work as much as being around with, something which i've never looked forward to. It really isn't much about the money and pay at the end of the month for me anymore. Truly, it's the company, cuteness, touching moments and spitting-into-the-jug-for-everyone-else issues. It a responsibility as well duh. I enjoyed the whole time i was there (well other than stupid mistake you can never imagine me doing >_>). I love A. Jessy who's taught me so much about life and maturity, A. Sue who's gave me a one in a million chance to work with children (and good pay! =D), Claudy who's helped me along the way and befriended me, A. Andrina and her oh-so-cheeky-nonsense, Maria with her most interesting stories and CHOCOLATES in autumnnnnnn, Fiona who shared pretty much of her experience with me and C.W. class, Reva who i met later in the months of work who is really an amusing lady. And for them all who have tattoos. They ARE teachers. I'm serious. That's the coolest. And most inspiring to me (enough to get me thinking to get one!). This is something i can't give anymore thanks to but to Carlyn who introduced me this job. I don't know how to thank you girl. I prefer the experience than the pay! A hundred times. But since it does come with the pay why not eh? >=3

It's been great knowing you all. And loving you.

That should be all from me tonight. I've gotta get my assignment rushed this time. Tues's the due but its close to no where but touched! G'night bloggie~ Love you so much and even more... Sweet dreams and God bless you loads!

I saw you smiling

Dear bloggie,

Trust me, it's been months seen there was a reason to type something here! Okaynottruejustkidding.

I was down a couple of weeks recently actually. I woke up with a truth i couldn't accept entirely and the world revolved differently from what i thought i'll be looking at. But i gave up and just swallowed it. I found something that made me really happy; then again, anyone would have realized that it also give its opposite - sadness. Oh what the hell, i thought. If i'm gonna have to take it, i'll take it indefinitely.

I was out almost the whole day yesterday thanks to an old friend who knew i wasn't in the best mood and thought it was a better idea to get me outta the house and keep me away from my thoughts. It sure happened!

We went for a movie, two meals, dessert and best part, he had to make sure i didn't spend a cent! That little monkeh. Serious! I felt horrible. I don't like the fact that you have to spend every penny for every stop especially the food. We could'a gone dutch! But, i really do appreciate that he understood that i wasn't working anymore, and by listening to what ever i told him, he knew i had a LONG LONG list of "Want to buy (but doesn't look achievable in the next ten days)". It's been a while since i've gone out for a movie. And good company. Thanks. A LOT. I was happy to breathe again.

- Now to wait for after finals for a good round of drinking! HUMANS. Where is our next stop?? -

It was raining slightly but no lightning nor thunder, sky was gray and dark in the evening about 4pm today. Was at the mall on the way home to wait for Dad as i walked down the steps and saw this elderly man with his grandchild and they were talking to each other. Suppose that small one was only about 3 or 4, but remembering that i work in H.O.G. reminded me of how cute they can really be. With a small smile, i walked pass them with happy thoughts. Minutes after, i was already waiting for Dad at the other side of the bridge hoping he'd be a little earlier today so i can get home and get the nap i wanted since i woke up =P

Unexpectedly, the both of them i saw earlier walked down the bridge with another old lady, who was obviously the elderly man's wife. The three of them was so happy and looking at them enlightened me a lot more when:

the little one said softly, "Open umbrella"

Grandma answered, "Yes i'm opening the umbrella now,"

then he repeated, "Open umbrella"

"Yes i'm opening the umbrella, come, follow grandpa,"

So grandpa told, "Okay now hold onto Grandpa,"

I couldn't help to look at them, to know that they were smiling throughout that little conversation and i HAD to smile as well. It was just too cute a scene to ignore! I smiled at Grandma and i told her "bye".

She answered, "Bye!"

"Take care!"

"Have a nice day" she replied.

And they walked, all three of them with one small dark gray umbrella along the busy road. Wonder if i'll see them again ^_^

All i did was looked up into the sky and smiled with a sigh, a good sigh of course. After all these months, THIS is definitely the most beautiful thing that've happened. True enough, i couldn't help smiling and thinking about what happened in the evening. It was just, speechlessly beautiful.

Now, i'm anticipating the future a little more than usual. Three weeks is a long time true (only works for me =B), but i didn't think it was time to give into anything just yet; including all those good months before this.

What happened the past months then? - You ask. Nothing much. Other than hating my lecturer so much for assignments that couldn't make any better sense. Serious.

That's all from me this few months. I'll be waiting for the coupl'a next ones but i hope it's much earlier than that... Till then, night bloggie! Take care... I miss you so much and i love you even more ^_^

Paint my Masks

Dear bloggie,

The night sure is bored like it always have been.

Unlike usual nights, i have decided to do a small review on the eye masks that i've been getting and trying out =D Firstly, all thanks to Renee at LYN for being such a friendly and approachable seller all these time~ Then the great prices and masks i've been trying out. Moving on to the small review...

THIS is my first ever eye mask i tried - Sea Kelp Brightening Eye Mask. Which seem to be really famous among the girls at LYN who's been hanging around there. I bought about ten of these because Silvy and I had to get a whole bulk (a box of 10) if we wanted it. So 10bucks for 10 eye masks - Why not! Though when applied it was tingly and all, i couldn't really see any improvement from the bags'a my eyes neither the clearer skin color of my dark circles. No doubt, it was a great start and an interesting experience! By the way, it smelt pretty fragrant when i had them =D



The following eye masks i got were four of each. One of them is the 24k Active Gold Eye Mask - With Botanical Essence. Now, how true the botanical essence are... I've gotta do some research on them =3 BUT this really is one of the best eye masks i've tried because immediately when applied, you'll definitely not miss the cool menthol like sensation! Not to mention the "even cooler" part when you're in yer nice air conditioned room~ I love this masks loads and i think in the long run, it should work better since i only managed 4 pairs of this... Already have them in my order list for more <3 Fragrant on this mask is the same as the Bamboo Salt Mask which is a little salty for some reason. But it's not TOO salty. Just a hint of it. Smells pretty pleasant and not strong at all.


Another not bad product is the Bamboo Salt Eye Mask which i didn't manage to take any picture of it because i was too happily using them all up =P But the effects and cool sensations are pretty similar to the 24k eye mask.

Next eye mask is the Crystal Collagen Eye Mask. Honestly at first, i really didn't not fancy this mask thinking that it only works for the bottom part of my eyes. Outta two masks, i've tried 3 already and results, not extremely noticable but it's very comfortable once you get the hang of wearing it a little lower from the bottom lash line. My first mistake was to put exactly at my bottom lash line and that was horribly irritating to the point i couldn't even fall asleep like other masks i've tried! Unlike regular all-over-your-eyes-eye-mask, this mask doesn't give the first "cool sensational" effect but it does after a while. What they really are, are two transparent jelly like patches coated in purified water. The interesting part is also where the expiration and manufacturing date is imprinted on the back of the packet (as zoomed out by me). I suppose i'm gonna get more of these masks from the next batch onwards! Smell? It's a little sweet fragrant but nothing heavy. In fact a little too mild! Anyone who'd prefer masks without much scents, this would be a great choice.


Finally the last eye mask - Milk Brightening Eye Mask. That my sister have been using more than me... Says here, "... Unique materials and pure milk, paired with active spring water..." Suppose it's better than the "i'm not sure what's in it" description~ Similar to the Sea Kelp Eye Mask, this also works pretty much the same. Not much of the tingly sensation, smell's really sweet and not really super milky like i thought it was going to be!



So far, these are the only masks i've been experimenting on. I'd really like to pile up my pockets to try the rest since the point where feedback's from other buyers does help a lot and in addition to the recommendation of the seller, you'd most likely not go wrong.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back to my o-can-be-so-hopeless-life, it's been good recently. Staying home chilling like any student should be doing when they're a fish out of water with a quiz which i have just underestimated the power of emailed notes unlike the ones months and semesters ago... Moral to learn, read the notes either way how simply stupid they sometimes may be.

Been tired lately and also been needing loads of rest and sleep. Recovering from my weeks before? Maybe!

I gotta really go now. It's early but... Oh well. Nights bloggie! Sweet dreams!~ God bless you and love you to the max loads!~ <33

As you can see

Dear bloggie,



There's no fun when you're stuck with working your ass off just to pay that mobo you blew, wanna go for dancing classes, earning stopped abruptly because of your fucking boss, parent's not encouraging to pay for it and knowing that your body can't take the stress.

Recently been spending on a little extra clothings for CNY including my always wanted set of falsies therefore money has gone down. Not totally but, painful enough to watch it drop.

~ Eye masks (BluRR main tipu... She's not sharing money for this!)
~ Face masks
~ Falsies
~ Black Mascara (i can't believe i'm spending like 50bucks on this black crap >_>)
~ Clothings (it was a good deal)
~ Flats (for college what else, PLUS cutting down on those smexies))
~ Friend's Gift (erm. A little too early but =B)

Shit. Suppose the only thing that could'a be in line was the falsies. But i was looking forward for the D3k! Oh you sad case human being. I can't find any good reason why i wanted to work so badly. FUCK you old hag... I can't even decide on what to do.

~ Dance (trimesterly)
~ Black Mascara (ERM. YEARLY duh)
~ Massage (Father's Day perhaps?)
~ More clothes (???)
~ Prom ticks (summer - it's only JANUARY)
~ Sleeping Mask (this can wait)
~ ...
~ ....
~ .....
~ ......
~ .......
~ ........
~ .......
~ ......
~ .....
~ ....
~ ...

Should i get back to my old job? Should i look for another job which is convenient? Should i color my hair? *stress* Should i try another type of mascara that costs half the price? ARGH. Will any lingerie sale come along anytime soon? >_< Suppose it's a bad idea to keep BROWSING FOR NO REASON?? -> agreed. Help. Can i buy a little more time pleas...? Oh as if i have enough money forget it ~_~

Oh noes the house chores. I haven't started on any yet! YES i love my life! Woohoo! THIS is the rush i so totally _______.

Loves and kisses, sweet dreams night and God bless you totally bloggie.

Figures

Dear bloggie,

To receive calls when you're asleep seems to be pretty lagged out (?). But when you receive a call on someone who thinks life isn't just enough; you'd probably won't be able to get back to sleep - sadly.

Wonderfully, i did. Poor him. Called me up close to midnight worrying about death and looking at how it's even like before experiencing. Suppose, it's guilt. Thankfully, my Psychology background came to the rescue. Yay~ Don't be sad. It's over and keep looking at the bright side. Even if there were only two months, live it to the maximum and enjoy it! Why grieve and wished you were dead to reaslize in the end that it's just a nightmare no one wants to dream of? Talk to god. He listens. Talk to Jesus. He listens. Thats what i'd usually do when i'm pretty troubled (only that recently i've been a pretty bad girl not to do anything related to it =3).

My job. The day that i was about to enjoy it, was the day that i got kicked outta my seat! =DD (no, i'm not happy. Like seriously). I was discussing about work, about what we had to till she called me into the conference room and shot at me for the correct things i've been doing all these time. I swear, oh yes i swear that i'm not gonna let this go so easily. PLEASE respect the fact that i'm still a student here and you have no fucking right to shoot me that way. So what if i did like to wear jeans and sneakers to work? Have you fucking seen a student helper fucking wear formal attire? NO? Oh too bad. SO, fucking shut up. I'm mad. She lost her right hand and i'm not there to help anymore. Who's fault - YOU. I'm so sorry i'm not able to be your house sister for the time being since hu-ha happened. No one knows and i don't intend to let the world know either.

I'm not the best partner at L4D but i sure kicked zombies' asses that night i came home after dinner and SOME rest. Played the whole campaign on my own~ Without pris around since she was doing her homework... Don't wanna forget it but i don't wanna keep thinking about it either. What to do what to do... I'll figure it out soson;s i hope.

I'm putting on weight! Wargh~ Never mind.

Night bloggie. Take care and i so totally love you lots. Sweet dreams and byes!

A lone sum

Dear Bloggie,

The ironical story between my workplace and i. I never really thought we'll ever be this close to anyone at work. Well, CLOSE.

Been tired recently. Of almost everything. Perhaps thinking that the only way to keep things off my mind was to work. But being the usual weak person i've always been, weakness is second nature. Why - No good reason. Getting tired of almost everything around me (especially this new fucking mouse pris HAD to choose here!). Tired of the fact the scale's moving to the right, tired of my weak body, tired of my silly mind, tired of not getting an A for the subject i was so hoping to get, tired of thinking, tired of working so hard to earn so little in the end. Tired of spending on things i want to get for everyone including myself. Oh joy~ Tired is the new word in town! Only in my world that is.

Nice visit to college. Never thought you would. But not surprised either.

My parcel (oh wow- MY) isn't here yet... Why look at the month, it's already past new year and heading or CNY! Lol~ But i'm so looking forward to it! The ONLY thing for now... Ohs well.

I've been down. I'm down. I'm gonna be down. Where's that person when you need em'?Not much in the mood to type for once actually. And also the very strong feeling she's being all stupid again. True? Strangers can be big influences.

Night bloggie... I'm pretty dead sleepy but staying a little more to wait might make things worst. Take care and i love you loads. Always did. Sweet dreams!

*Yawn* derful

Dear Bloggie,

Notice the length from that day i updated~ Happy New Yearrrrrrrrrrr-desu!~ I"m so sleepy now.

Life for these days been good since the day i started work. Which? Oh college =3 Because i have a great Boss to work with!! YES~ That is the best thing that had only happened. Other than realizing that i could earn a little more for my cousin will be transferred pretty soon but not too sure how soon to HK~ And thanks to Mummy, "I MUST go to HK! No matter what!" now everyone will be a little too excited and will be a whole group vacation for sure. Wow. Hk Disney Land *_* WOW. Wowowowowowowowowowwwwwwww~

Cloud was there on Thurs night at work too just for the heck of it since she hasn't walked in at all. And yes she has lost more weight AGAIN (unlike me who does the reverse!) by what she told me "drinking every night without fail". Sure is nice to be able to drink that much but THAT much are you serious? I can't really imagine how her body's gonna function in the near future though. I mean from reading psychological references and how alcohol can really influence human body yadayadayadadadadadada. Other than that, it's just pretty sad how i'm not as loved in coll. Well you can't be the good books of every where now can we? I'm pretty much happy if i can help full stop. Nah i didn't make coffee for them but honestly, i never really thought i should. I mean, she's been there for how many years? -2. So yea she's got the experience. It's like working with Boss and knowing her ways and how she likes things and how to ans her. I'm really really happy that i could be of service and that i stay back every night for her NOT because i'm trying to sweep her off her feet but i fee that kinda love she's been giving me and been appreciating me. I have no problem and in fact am happy with stay back till 7 (which is been there done that just recently) to finish up her job and instead of leaving to fold the clothes and sleep (like been there done that NOW >_>).

I'm sleepy... And i'm being hated at work i suspect. Pretty cool eh? I didn't know i could have ever been a threat at work! Well yea i was off for months and months ago after he did and so did i. But i had my own reasons why i wanted to leave and i have my rights to not tell you why either. My name on a list, kinda like a time table chart was slashed off after i came in after like an hour. I have a strong feeling i know who she or he is but i can't make my moves. Told Boss but she told me (all my bosses are ladies =D) to ignore and she'll settle that person. Not really a problem there about the settling and stuff but i have no prove! I just SUSPECT and get that kinda "hate" feeling for the looks of a person. BECAUSE, ever since i reported back last fri, Bos transferred everything back to me and i got my old job back from what she was working on. Example, database and etcs. I was working on that last year before i left and she took over since then. And now that i'm back, she's lost everything and has to go back to what she does best. But she is good in that and earns a load from it. So what put me in your hate list? Hmm... Gotta do some investigation there.

CNY's gonna be just few weeks from now and mummy's already got her CNY cookies on plan! Been really busy the whole week and she really seem pretty upset. Reason because, she's like that when no one's home to keep her company. So predictable~ She's like me. We want company even when we say we don't and she's lonely. No one's home in the day and when everyone's home at night, i tell too much stories before and during dinner and after, i either am online or just gaming downstairs. OR sleeping. 9 to 7 isn't fun all the time =3 especially when you come home with grumpy mummy who expects you to settle the hse chores along with the hse chores. No i repeated it on purpose. BluRR can't help. That bad. Infamous "i don't wanna do the hse chores and i'm making you do it" isn't going anywhere but here. I want my rest as in, hang out on my own at the end of the day... Chill at the pc when i feel like it... Or even listen to music and snack out on seaweed (Thanks Jerry for the introduction!). I'm just so tired.

Sure. I'll have to repeat history in the either near future or in the future; but can't the younger one help as well. When i bring up the subject, she has the best excuses no one would bother thinking, "sorry but that was yeas ago. If you want it, you can go back to like what, 50 years ago? If not then too bad and sorry,". What nerve. I'm tired. Really tired. I don't think i'm ever going to ask anyone who works and studies at the same time now, "How do you cope working and classes?" In my case, work(s), classes and home which includes bratty siblings who're never open for hse chores and mum who suffers CKD and expects more from you.

Fingers crossed for the coming results. I managed to score from H.H. and i'm so, so so so so fucking happy i did! Screw you B3! MWAHAHAHAHAHA. Lol~ Error made, retrieved and now to wait again. Itadakimasu.

Now, since the door is opened, i'm going to sleep! Cockroach flew in about an hour ago from the cold weather outside and it's warmer here with the pc >_> Such excellent choice! Dang you small creature of doom! *stay away pls! T^T *#$)!@#&!&@)#!@$!* Hell it was flying. Hate it so much. Anyway, i gotta go sleep and get up earlier to fold the been there done that clothes before i start typing on my death bed.

Night bloggie! Sweet dreams, have fun, love you super loads and take care! I'll update again when i have sufficient news~