Do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do

Dear bloggie,

Only because I felt like singing.

A couple'a moments ago, I just found out an old post which I didn't manage to publish in July that I wasn't oomph-ed at work, coz I was getting bored of it - repetitive what not. NOW, I think I'm about to murder my boss, every way I can. Oh, not to mention my team mates.

I've pondered about it and thought, "Am I really such a bad employee?". Every blinking email reply is sandwiched with the juiciest negative remark in any form; it's either "you don't read emails", "you obviously missed the deadline", "since you're not efficient enough, I'll take over", "again, I repeat" or "I don't ____ for an answer". And again, I wonder - who's the one who isn't able to manage his team? 

Look, we've (fucking team mates as asses from planet dumb-a-tron) done the same mistakes over time and repeatedly, there's obviously something wrong. Why? If I knew, I wouldn't be sitting here now. I'll be at the Empire State making cocktails singing "do wah diddy diddy dum diddy do". So, 

1. We don't get meetings (oh we sure do once every 3 months), 
2. I don't know what exactly went wrong with my assignments,
3. My suggestions are usually foggy and somehow disappears within an email or two,
4. We don't have an update AFTER the meeting with your boss and;
5. Obviously we don't even know exactly what we're supposed to do (because I can suddenly be involved or be held responsible for the things I never was!).

How fucked can we get, eh? I love my job, seriously, jokes all aside. I love what I write (copy writing), uploading, updating whatnots, liaising with the media (occasionally), dancing from state to state to do my utter awesome social work (company, of course) and newsletters. I take that back. Not the quarterly newsletters. You don't know how painful the agony just coming up with one issue. And this time around, the due is within a week - guess what? My (stupid ass) team mate and I just got a mail not too long ago with a warning, here I indirectly quote, "Your participation is encouraged, however if your assigned task is not completed at all, you won't be joining". Means I don't get to go to the awesomest party ever in November. In also other words, I'm on leave and flying to Timbaktu. Honestly, my answer would've been "the fuck I care. Come at me bro". For all with guts, please raise your hands - no.

Boss, I'm sick of your fun and games, making me all demotivated and shit when you say you don't. I am so sick, I am so tempted to walk out here right now. I'm not doing it because of me, not you. I kinda miss my old boss who gave a shit about my progress no matter how much I have done and almost died from it, at least I lost weight. I can bet you with an eye or two that I've not gained any experience from my recent escapade from work, in fact everything just got worse! To think that a new boss would've oiled the gears in my work life, I beg to differ.

Am I at work now? Yea, sure am. In fact, I've got a tonne of stuff to complete by today and I'm busy typing out a storm on my blog. I'm tired and sick. I wanna get out of HERE.

Bloggie, there hasn't been anything fancy in the last month or so. Hence it was a full frontline machine gun massacre for today and I'll only post another rosy update sometime soon. Maybe one of our event which I've attended? Maybe.

Anyway, I love you lots bloggie. To the grave we go when the time comes; but I've got unfinished business tonight. 

Beautiful Disaster

Dear bloggie,

Been FOREVER hasn't it? Okay maybe not as long as a year but...


Things has been on the rough side recently but my world has been revolving healthily.


The all electronic restrictions are called off,
I get to be with my bestest buddies (who are mostly guys - gay or not is a different story yea...),
There's definitely a night I can drink away with no limit,
Might be working hard till the latest nights but no one's holding me back,
These flabs has a chance to go back here it belongs,
Tears can stay where it should be,
My heart doesn't need to bleed any further,


And most of all, I get to taste how promising is like and how easy someone whom you believe can give you happiness is not always the same person who is your life. It was an eye opening experience which was not the easy way. But I am very confident that this time around, I'm not the same Doll whom I was, and I don't plan to stay old and broken.


You're beautiful - a beautiful disaster.


Anyway, life has taught me a little of everything such as keeping in touch with people whom I've always thought "are busy and not disturb them" might not be as "busy" as they sound or might have seem to be. Often a time, we restarin ourselves from everything that's in the bigger picture but are worried about how it'll be; that's me. I give up on trying hard. The one thing I learnt from you - it'll happen when it should and it's yours if it is. Not the fanciest ways no doubt.


"You don't need friends, alone is always better"
I've been in contact with my oldest of the oldest friends and boy am I glad I've called every dong from every nook and cranny! They've really helpful in my downest days. A college friend'a mine whom I was invited out with is close to lunacy; he's so out of this planet, I just found out he's married. How cool is that? And the wedding bells rang in June. Hello - I've been in contact with you for the past months! Could you've been nicer to even tell this good news? Some friend! Then again, it was good dinner, good company and most of all, a good laugh.

"Why should you be sexy for everyone else? It's so sluttish"
My sexy pin-up look is the best of me. Dita Von Teese is my idol. If I could wear corsets everyday and not worry about running about, moving around, I'd do it. Up to date, I've got a generous amount which I SHALL wear them to events. Except my annual dinner this year which has the WORST dress code ever. And about that, I really gotta get another corset lace...

"Technology is the worst thing invented on earth"
Good Lord, Holy macarony I tell you. Twitter would've won the "Best Ranting Website" in the galaxy. Reasoning? No one else would listen. I mean, look, who on the face of Earth wants to listen to sob stories, ridiculous rants and cranky complains? Once it's done, the world seem to be the best place to live so what's the problem with technology? I, for one, love it!~

"You can't dance. There'll be guys who'll partner with you"
All I've ever been good at was dancing but mum and dad didn't approve that; not until they realized how wonderfully talented my hips could shimmy. I did think it'll be good to stay away from male partners in dancing but belly dancing is a no-no? You're kidding me. The biggest excuse would've made sense if it was said nicely. But... So, I don't aim to do it just yet. I'm sitting here waiting for the OLDEST buddy I've kept in touch with since since to learn and now, I'm so excited I can hardly breathe. Hesitant - yes. Reluctant - no. I hope I can catch up quick!

Somedays, I wished I stayed asleep my whole life because the dreams all seemed sweeter no matter what happens because when I flip my eyelids open, reality comes crashing back into me. Honestly, I was desperate to lose myself as much as I could. Not every day is a perfect fairy tale especially in mine. I've come to a point where, life is too pointlessly short to stay solemn. My only worry is my distrubed routines and a new path to change. Or like Krazy Ken, "All we have been leaving behind are dotted lines. Sometimes we've gotta move back and draw the line from where we were" and it made sense. BUT, I learnt that it WASN'T his phrase! It was Steve Jobs! That Esso. Whatever they both said, it made sense.

How ever fucked up my dreams were because of you, at least I woke up from it.

G'day bloggie. Hasn't been the happiest moments that happen yet again. But, I'm happy inside. Love you so much bloggie! I'll definitely have something more exciting in life after last Wednesday. Take good care'a yerself there no matter what~ Bye!~~