Dolls can cry too

Dear bloggie,

I have been so emotionally unstable recently yet no one can see it. It like my mask over my face is too thick or something.

Just had questions that kept bugging me recently...

Do i really like you just because you're more dominant than me? Or is just that i see you as dominant because i always give into.

Do you really mean what you say when everyone isn't around? Or you just tell me to make me feel good.

Will all my choices turn out better than what i think it would be like? Or i'm just lying to myself to make me happy.

Why did you change your word "love" to "like" suddenly in our conversation? Or is it that you are not sure about me.

Does it make a difference if i did have cosmetics on or not? Or there could be nicer words like, "you still look like you when i look at you".

Am i really as important as you said i am? Or you just say it for the heck of it.

Why do you never praise me for a good reason anymore? Or my exotic-ness disappeared into thin air.

What did you mean when you didn't want anyone else to know if one day we are together? Or you're just afraid ppl finds out that i am a replacement for your ex.

Could you try to open up to me for a bit? Instead of keeping everything to yourself. You call me a friend. In fact closer than an average one but pretend as if i'm not there when i see you.

Would there be a difference when you're not around with me anymore? Or i would be graving everyday thinking about you.

What am i doing? Slacking my life through thinking that i'm fine; that's what i'm doing.

All hurt and suffering but ignoring it because i believe. Believe of? Of something i think i'll not be happy? I don't know. Just wanna get over it really, really, really fast.